Am I 15 Again?

So, I was once again speaking to the father of my future child and he goes, "Hey, MY NAME, why don't we get together this week, I haven't seen you in a while". "Huh, I'm busy this week" was my response. I'm scared I've gained a lot of weight since I've last seen him and I'm almost certain he'll be all Ewwwwwwwwwww! when he sees me. Why do I think this. I'm a fat girl, always have been, more than likely always will be. I think highly of myself most of the time but, never being this big before, I must admit I often feel not bad about myself, but just weird. I've gained I don't know how much weight, but I know that my thighs, legs and waist are all about 4 or 5 inches bigger then they were. How much weight that equals, I am not sure but, it bothers me at times, I won't sit here and say that it doesn't. The last time I saw him, I know I was thinner and more in shape, I have those two stapled together pictures to prove that to me. I have this weird notion in my head that if I fast and work out like crazy for the next week or so I will be able to lose all the weight I've gained in like the last year and a half. I don't want to feel down on myself, but, I don't know, I think I'm sad.